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The Flame Writer's FAQWe get tons of flame letters saying that we're presumptuous and ignorant - and on top of that, we insult each other's work all the time. Since you pathetic whiners never come up with anything original to complain about, we don't respond to flames as a matter of policy. But if you just can't resist wasting your time anyway, here are some helpful hints. (JA)
"Just what the FUCK gives you guys the right to dismiss casually with a flip of your hand (most likely the only love of your life) all of these albums that you obviously didn't listen very closely to." - Russ Allert, 26 November 1995 It's called the First Amendment here in the U. S. of A. If you find the right of free speech repellent, you're a fascist and should get the hell off the Web. (JA) "You feature throw-away observations which are not based on any examination of the facts, but are simply cliche." - C. H. Graham, 24 February 1996 We listen to every record we review at least three times. Many of them are barely listenable in the first place, so that's saying a lot. And most of the major pages - including the Doors - are based on years of careful listening. When we say Jim Morrison's range sucks, we know what we're talking about. (JA) "it's amazing that you are a critic and you haven't listened to them all." (i.e., the Stones catalogue) "you say don't have it but critic (sic) it anyway." - cianci walsh, 11 March 1996 We'd love to have every single recording by the Stones, or the Who, or whoever, but we also think that after listening to, say, 21 Stones/Richards records and 19 Who/Townshend records, we're entitled to some kind of an opinion. (JA) "How old are you? I assume you are JA, the "author" of Juvenile, Asinine reviews of some great albums." - Ernie Osborne, 14 February 1996 David Wilson was born in 1967, John Alroy in 1966. Both of us have been around long enough to know the difference between good music and crap like Steve Stills' Right By You. (JA) I see you have willingly jumped on the fashionable anti-led zeppelin bandwagon along with the other pubescent alternative-music worms who don't know an E chord if it bit them on the ass (and hence have nothing but enmity to those who do)." - Dan "dbambe," 30 May 1997
Not only are Wilson and Alroy so far from being pubescent it makes us want to cry, but both of us are guitar players, songwriters, and singers (of a sort). We sure the hell know how to play E chords. Both of us can handle rhythm, lead, and bass. Wilson also plays saxophone, flute, keyboards, and drum machines. Here are some AU format examples of Wilson (712k) and Alroy (756k) in action.(JA) "I question the validity of people who make a living by criticizing others." - Mark Fladeland, 16 February 1996 We don't make a dime off this site; it's strictly non-profit, and it actually costs us money to keep it going. (JA) "Are you a heavy metal punk or some other freak?" - anonymous coward, 24 January 1996 If you don't think that people who appreciate everything from Jimi Hendrix to Los Van Van to Joni Mitchell to John Coltrane to the Beach Boys to Prince are well-rounded, you don't know your ass from your elbow. (JA) "...what are you a couple of Siskel and Ebert wannabes?" - Forest James Zinn, 18 December 1995 Uh, last time we checked Siskel and Ebert were movie critics... (JA)
"...where are your Todd Rundgren reviews? - Lance Harke, 15 November 1995
If we haven't reviewed an artist, it's because we don't have their records (we pay for all the records we review out of our own pocket). Now, if you're willing to donate some CD's to us, we're willing to listen to 'em. For further details, see our new Why Don't You Review...? page. (DBW) "I guess anyone can have an opinion. God bless America" - Tedd Kessler, 7 February 1996 I don't know about the God part... or even the America part (remember the Communications Decency Act?)... other than that I agree completely! (DBW)
u r verrry dumb. At least I can spel. (JA)
Wilson and Alroy, FUCK YOU!
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